My papa

About my dad's health condition, it's already not a new concern to me. Though his health level is considered good now, nothing to be worried much, but every time i see him, i would feel guilty as his daughter. I'm sure that he's not as strong as before, i'm very clear that he already reached his 'golden age', and i always feel his muscles and body just need rest but not too much rest too, ha ha. some healthy, relaxing and mind-challenging activities must be available to him to have his time occupied. I wish so much that i can afford to give him the best health and best pleasures in life, like buy him his most favourite books, the nicest sofa, a big and comfort house, and anything he likes, no matter how expensive those things'll be. But in the real world there's the real fact that i have no such financial ability. When will i have that ability? i'm clear about that, i still have a long time to go before i'm financially independent. But i just wish it could be now, he just deserved to enjoy the best now. I think too far may be, but i'll just have more and more of that feeling as i see him grow older and older....i feel guilty too sometimes if he cares and do too much things for me... I'll try my best to give you the best, ya.

4th Day-23rd Nov

The last day, we visited the medical ward and surgery ward in the morning to get an insight into the doctors' daily working routine in the ward. However, we are left there doing nothing and we can't help up on anything (of course, coz we don't have the required skills) although deep inside our heart we yearned so much to reach out. We just have some chatting with the patients and try to attend to their basic needs, and got bored so fast. The session also ends early...ha..
Visited frineds in UM too, and joined them to the human boday specimen hall where they studied anotomy there. The specimens there had been left for almost 2 decades and the body texture became almost like soil. From soil men were made and to dust they'll return, now i realized how true it's!
The meaning of life to me has changed somehow...got to see life from another perspective now. =)

3rd day..-22nd Nov.

It's the 3rd day, we are brought to the pathology department today. we visited the histopathology and cytology lab irst. The histology lab is where the fixation of the specimen is done by using a solution of 10% formalin, followed by the proces of waxing, thinning up to 4 um and finally staining with Xerin and other stains which i don't know how to name them. The observation of the nucleus of specimen under microscope will tell everything about the result. Abnormal cell will have different/unusual nuclear-membrane proportion and the nuclear envelope'll be unclear. The cell specimen can also be cut into only 1.5 um using () The whole process can be done in only 10 mins but only for emergency case as it involves very high cost.. While at the histopathology lab2, specimens are further processed, and here the diagnosis are done. The staining process involved more complex colour stain. AT the cytology lab the cel is studied under microscope. There's also TV screen for microscopic view. Learn quite a lot at the labs here.
After that, the most exciting part came, we have the chane to witness a post-mortem. A male Bangladeshi at the age of 30 sth died suddenly at home on the day before, he is suspected alleged poisonous. The whole process is very suspending. The whole body is cut half, ribs are cut open in the middle then all the fresh organs are taken out, even the brain! I've seen all the real organs for the first time ever, and i will never forget about that scence...The organs are examined thoroughly, all parts are cut into pieces to check on. We are all so stunned to have viewed the whole thing. The face expression of the diseased is still clear in my mind till now and i just hope I won't have any nightmare about this.. Haha...

2nd day- 21st Nov

Feeling reluctantly, we start our second day in hospital. Today we spent the whole day at the Rehabilitation department. We have a chance to glance over the wound washing of diabetic patient by staff nurse. We are then brought to ward 8U where we saw patient who sufferred from stroke, some got half-paralysed or paralysed down the waist and some lost their muscle strength. We studied how the facilities in the ward is designed to suit their special needs.
We also visited neurotherapy clinic and a small gym where patients undergo exercises with weighing bags to strengthen their muscle. For patient who can't stand on their feet, they need to exercise on a device which'll incline a little by little to help them support on their feet. The hospital also do rehabilitaton for stroke patient, they need to exercise their hands and turn their body to prevent their muscle from losing strength, although the patient'll be in great pain to do that. I feel pity to one pak cik who sufferred so much because of stroke. Hai... We also visited the occupation therapy clinic where hyperactive children or children with slow development( mentally disabled) is treated. The orthopedic clinic is also an important and only workshop in the hospital where false legs are moulded. At noon, we attend a lecture on rehabilitation and we learnt how disabled persons of various cases make their way towards independent life. An economic graduate who had lost all his arms and legs still face his life optimistically and survived and is mobile in his wheelchair which he controlled by using only his chin. It's an inspiring lecture for us.
In the afternoon, we visited the orthopedic clinic again but a different one and lastly we witnessed a minor surgery in the operation room. Witnessed the whole process and the doctors are really very professional. Finally, a sag is taken out from the patient's right wrist, and it's said to be a ganglion... Quite scary to see the doctor pull open the flesh wide, huh... but it's not a bloody surgery though, but i can still feel the tense in the room..Haha..

First day..-20th Nov

I've lost touch with this blogsite for quite a time. That's because i have been busy all week. First with my hospital attachment, then i ended last week with illness. I suppose i've got some eye-infection from the hospital and i even had vomitted a few times to be serious enough to get an injection on my butt, ha ha. But thank God i'm okay now.

The UM Medical Centre is a good training ground for apprentice doctors and specialists with various departments. There's the UM Specialist Centre which caters for ONG, Otorhinolaryngology(ENT) and Ophthalmology(Eye). And there are even kiosks and Delifrance in the hospital, which i never thought of.
The staff in charged for our attachment "tour" first brought us to the surgery department where we have the chance to visit most of the area of operation department. The operation region is isolated from the outside atmosphere by having its own internal air circulation system. Doors are set to close automatically all the time, and all windows are closed. The air is recleansed cotinuously to minimise infection. There's the pre-operation region where patients who are about to undergo operation is given thorough body check-up on blood pressure, heart pulse, breathing condition and so on. We also learnt that there are 3 operation theatres among 16 o.t. which are reserved for emergency case. As for the patients who has undergone operation will be placed in a region of 'post-operation' where they'll be attended by personal medical staff for detailed care until their 'critical moments' is over. Besides that, we have the chance to visit one of the o.t. but an empty one, that o.t. is meant for emergency use, we are not allowed to enter the other o.t. which are on operation as we've missed the time. Sigh...
In the afternoon, we visited the out patient department. There's a special clinic which's meant for T.B. patient. The T.B. patient is adviced to receive regular consultation but have to collect their medication from the consultant itself as the T.B. can be infected through air contaction and thus they are best to avoid from going to public places for other patients' safety. Besides that, we also went to the outpatient and inpatient worklab of pharmacy department. We learnt how the medicine are dispensed accordingly and how the system works.
Feeling tired at the end of the day with some disappointment as we didn't learn much as we had expected and may be because some of the staff just treat us lightly..

What is music to you?

Music is freedom that relentlessly exists
Freedom of speech
Freedom of thought
Freedom of creativity
Freedom of imagination

Music is ever soothingly healing
A bombardment of on-going expression of feelings

Music is a tool of unity
Always bringing people together as family
Hence be described as a mentor of spirituality

Music is magic
Performing its tricks
With sweet instrumental tones and lyrics
Emotionally captivating and positively distracting
Music is a form of beautiful art

Music is an angel
Singing out from the skies as she flies
Music is love
the food of all moods

Get up...

Holidays...the pace's just so slow...so slow that make me so lag. Feel myself doing nothing all days. I can't find anything more interesting than online and movie. I even watched discovery for hours. Whoa.....sometimes feel bored until i feel myself so old. No, no, i'm just making myself boring because my mind thinks i'll be boring. Stop that ok?
I still remember, there's one line i heard which roughly means never stop doing things too long or you will lose the momentum to go on. Everyday should be organised and things should be prioritised or else you'll end up unproductive-uninterested-boring-sleeping. I know, i know, i'm just so lazy to do things i should do to achieve things i dreamt of. So, please get up and move on to do something ya...

nasty...

...everyone has different mindset, and people with different level of wisdom really think differently. And ya, it's not easy to communicate with people with different mindset. Okay, it's not hard to 'communicate', but the topics of conversation will be 'nothing' to me. May be you'll think i'm so arrogant, so it's my fault. Ya, i don't know what 's wrong with me, but i just find it hard to be respectful. I didn't do anything but i've done something to one's feelings. who knows?

another half round

Whoa...still have to battle for one week, during the exam season, you can sense the power of exam, how it can influence every candidate’s life. Most people’s lifestyle will change entirely, we’ll do things we won’t do normally, and the most important thing is that we’ll give up doing things which we’ll normally do. The probability of me reading newspapers or story books decrease to almost <10% out of 100 during exam time, I just don’t have the mood to read even the interesting fiction or watch my favourite movie. I just want this season to be over faster. This semester’s going to end soon though. I’ve learned to enjoy life entirely as a student boarding outside home finally starting this semester and this semester seems to end a bit too fast for me. My ability to adapt to a new environment here is just so poor that I just really really start to settle myself comfortably this semester.
Hope this weekend will be a beautiful weekend.

Beautiful spain..

the nice blue sea...

Far..far..

It's really not easy to blog regularly, the internet cafe's closed all this while and when the cafe finally reopens, the blogger.com lost connection after i finish typing a post ready to be published. hoo... It's really funny to find out blogger.com can lost connection with the server. My blog have been refused for so many times...haiz..
Really miss my sister after receiving photos from her after they ended their autumn holiday in Spain. Spain...seems a place really far away from me... What i know about Spain is just it's medditeranean climate and the very nice and peace deep blue sea..very nice...and clear. Why can't all the places in the world have unpolluted sea like this? Every drops of pure sea water... Really miss you, my sister. but why everytime wheen we chat through the phone, it's just quite hard to find our common interests topic....because of distance??..We seems to be so formal and just cant talk deep into the topics of our hearts...

Blog?

Normally people blog because they want their thoughts to be heard, and yes, i do want my thoughts to be shared, and perhaps get some comment from it. A blogsite should be a place that can let you let off steam when you face any angry, sad or unjust situation. All my blogs will be my personal feelings and opinions, however, in order not to offend someone or touch any sensitive issue, there's quite a lot of limits to adhere when i'm penning my thoughts...and sometimes things may be exaggerated, all bloggers have moral responsibility for what they write, should i continue to voice my thoughts on this platform, or maybe i blog in a very vague way? Here i apologise first if i happen to offend someone here in the future. =)

oh,finally....

Here it is, my first ever blog in my life. I finally able to snatch some time in this afternoon to create a blog spot personally for myself. I've been long wondering why some people are like 'can't live without blogging'. And now i know. It's actually such a good idea to keep your thoughts in words, i don't want my memories, good or bad, just pass by without any footprints. When you left no footprints, no way you can retrieve it, right? This reminds me about time, time pass by without leaving any track and for that time is life. Perhaps i can leave some of my memories here and keep it still, so that it doesn't fade along with time.
Whoo....my thoughts seems a bit solemn here isn't it. Ha ha. Recently my thoughts are quite complicated, exam is coming and i still didn't study much, sort of losing my 'ohm' in life. I gave a deep thought about this and myself. I realized that's actually not an old me. I used to be a student who's very obedient in school and i admit that i used to be a 'bookworm', all mylife's just about scoring good grades.. and good grades....Now i came to realized that life's actually more about love and relationship and family and friends. Life is life itself. but is this a good change, i don't know. Believe or not, i realized myself mature quite a lot since i came to study at shah alam. you once said to me not long ago, "you're different now..." "hoh? towards the good or bad?" i responded. "you're getting mature suddenly, and you talk differently now". Oh, you know your words had surprised me and stay so secure in my heart... feel surprise really, or maybe i used to be such a girl whose thought's always childish, and that's why i muture "suddenly". Ha. But i believe this is a good one, and thank God for that.
It's such a great moment last night to celebrate Weilin's birthday. Fun and full of jokes. But sorry to you guys ya who had been left out in the invitation list. I regret why i don't just sms and ask, really don't know how to explain to you guys. Apologies for that.... And wei lin, so happy to see your surprised face last night and may your birthday wish come true ! (although you seems so paise and didn't really make a wish, ha ha = )